• What NoMo is not

NoMo is not a dating website. Please do not register with the intention of showering other members with messages to chat them up and hook up with them. This behaviour will not be tolerated and we ask you to immediately report it to us. NoMo encourages members to keep a complete profile page on the site, to engage with the profiles of other users and to connect with each other at socials (and take it from there!). If you are looking for online non-monogamous dating, OK Cupid makes a great resource.

NoMo is not a swingers club. In a traditional sex club, the action is dominated by stereotypical gender roles (straight men and bi/bi-curious women),  focusses heavily on sexual interaction and exploitation (“Matt and I are looking for a unicorn”, “my wife and I are really into you guys, would you like to go to a private room?”, “I really want to fuck your girlfriend”) and is normed by couple privilege (“My boyfriend and I only have sex with other couples”, “My wife and I can play with others but only if we are together”, “I can have sex with whoever I want but my wife Laura can only have sex with a girl”, “My boyfriend Rob can only get blowjobs and must not kiss”).

In contrast to all of the above, NoMo aims to offer a platform where the individual is at the center, regardless of their chosen relationship status in everyday life. If you choose to attend one of our play events with (a) partner(s), you understand that exerting any type of couple privilege on them is a big no-no. They will be left free to interact with other members as they please, from starting conversation to engaging in sexual interaction. Since such radical intimacy requires a high level of confidence, trust and emotional maturity, please discuss your boundaries with your partner(s) beforehand.

If you are a couple or a single looking to hook up and get laid, check out Killing Kittens or Le Boudoir.

NoMo is not a fetish party or a BDSM club. Although there is some overlap between the non-monogamous community and the kink scene, we feel like London already has a lot to offer in that respect. Please check out the London Fetish Scene Calendar.


  • Who can see my personal data?

Your name and location can be accessed by administrators only. All other personal information, including sexual preferences and your chosen community profile picture, are visible to members only. Nobody can view your community profile unless they are a registered, vetted member of NoMo.


  • Why do I need to disclose my sexual preferences?

Information about your sexual preferences is gathered with the sole purposes of facilitating interaction amongst members and ensuring a balanced mix of experience and sexualities at each event.


  • Do I need to add pictures to my community profile?

This is not a dating website, so you are not required to submit pictures or create a photo gallery. However, bear in mind that a profile picture showing your face will help other members gain interest in you and identify you at NoMo events.


  • Who decides on whether my membership request is approved or not?

Admission is at the sole discretion of NoMo Team, who examine each new request for membership and collectively make a decision.


  • Why has my application been rejected?

Believe it or not, most applications which are rejected end up so because the applicant fails to meet the 150-words minimum requirement. Other times, it is because the statement is poor, vague or not aligned with NoMo’s ethos. Due to the high number of applications, we generally do not offer specific feedback on each application. If you believe your application was rejected unfairly, please get in touch.


  • What is a “verified user” and how can I become one?

A “verified user” is a member that NoMo Team have met in person at a social. You can become one by coming along!


  • How can I contribute?

Members are encouraged to become an active part of the community. If you wish to write a blog post, contact an administrator and ask to be made an Author. NoMo is ever-evolving so if you have ideas and suggestions, feel free to contact NoMo Team in writing or in person.


  • Is there a dress code to your play events?

NoMo aims to provide a sophisticated and comfortable environment, so you are encouraged to dress accordingly. Recommended looks include cocktail casual and smart casual – in general, anything you would wear on a smart London night out.

NoMo is kink-attire friendly, but think ‘sexy, sophisticated and playful’ rather than ‘hardcore’, ‘fetish’ or ‘goth’. We encourage all types of play and the use of fetish accessories (and many members are also kinksters), but NoMo is not a fetish party.

Also, please avoid sports shirts, dirty/ripped jeans, tracksuit style trousers, running/training/sports shoes, dirty footwear, sandals, caps, hoodies or ripped, tattered, dirty clothes.

NB: If NoMo are participating as a group to an event hosted by a third party, make sure to check the dress code of our host.


  • Is there an age limit?

No, other than legal age (18+). Because lifestyle matters pertain to all age groups, here at NoMo we believe that unrestricted access to resources and a support network is a universal right. That is why membership is open to all members of the public who are able to display genuine interest in conscious relationships.

Selection criteria for play events are based purely on emotional maturity, physical fitness and psychological well-being – not on age. We appreciate that these qualities are complex to gauge, and that you may feel let down by a negative decision on your enquiry. This perceived strictness is the result of our wish to create intimate group experiences that truly work for everyone involved, and do not just satisfy the personal desires of a few.